A lot of people adore Christmas. It's the most wonderful time of the year, whether you celebrate in a spiritual or secular way. The things that we hold dear at this time of the year are family and friends; of familiarity; of tradition.
Adopted children struggle with Christmas. We are advised as adopters to keep things low-key, to not overwhelm. Adopted children have massive feelings of guilt and of loss at this time of the year. They don't know what to do. They don't know the traditions and they are unfamiliar with what everyone around them knows is familiar.
It occurred to me as we approached this wonderful time of the year that in their short lives Little Miss and Mister Man were not only experiencing OUR Christmas for the first time, this would be the fourth consecutive Christmas that they had spent in a different family with different traditions. Not only was our Christmas unfamiliar, every Christmas was.
And yes, they were overwhelmed. And yes, they found it upsetting at times. But I sat them down and I told them that I understood.
And I told them to remember the traditions that they've learnt this year because next Christmas and every Christmas after would be just like the last one because this family is forever.
